10. Obama was actually giving a "pre-action" to Paul Ryan's speech on the state of the union.
9. Biden laughed when Obama said he would veto earmarks because he thought it would be silly to ban place holders for audio books.
8. While praising the ratification of START Obama forgot to mention that piece of paper was his idea of a missile defense shield.
7. Biden was frowning the whole time because he was sad he forgot to bring his Nintendo DS.
6. Biden suggested "Win the future," which he plagiarized from a slot machine at some indian casino he tried to...invest...stimulus money in.
5. Obama's favorite example of government inefficiency, salmon regulation, is code for the two-party system.
4. Pelosi said she didn't feel like a little person until Steny Hoyer "accidentally" tried sitting in her seat while she was still in it.
3. The only thing Obama ran to the center of was attention.
2. Boehner teared up when Obama saluted him because he didn't want the night to end without something real coming out of it.
1. When Obama said this is our "Sputnik moment" he was criticizing GOP efforts to prevent our debt from going into orbit.