So here's the deal, recovery.gov needs its name changed to something more realistic, heres what I think certain people would suggest. Add your ideas by commenting below!
Rahm Emmanuel: getf**kedupandraisetaxeswoooohoooo.gov
John Kerry: close-loopholes.gov/or-theyll-miss-the-boat
Nancy Pelosi: dont-tax-my-stuff.com/botox
Tim Geithner: notmyproblem.gov/haha
Vice President Biden: recession.bfd
President Obama: cling2change.gov/yours
Al Gore: buycarboncredits.mobi/private-jet
Chris Dodd: i-gots-mine.net/gain/countrywide
Hillary Clinton: howdoyoulikemenow.f.u/2012
Eric Holder: i-dont-read.info/?recession
Barney Frank: no-fannie_yes-freddie.org/y
Michelle Obama: my-sacrifice-is-none-of-your.biz
Ever since Obama' started chastising the GOP for not coming up with "new" ideas, I've been wondering what "new" ideas could be originating from his administration...
10. Point out how our trillion dollar deficits meet the goal of avoiding gazillion dollar deficits.
9. Hire the first official White House chiropractor under the code name, "Dr. Obowma."
8. Make it crystal clear that the president TOTALLY opposes gay marriage....except in cases where the participants are straight (or gay)...seriously though...yuck... ;-D
7. Muslim outreach will include NASA putting Mars on hold until the president knows the effects of zero gravity on jihad.
6. Extol the virtuous dichotomy of the First Lady being both Obesity Czar and Secretary of Let-Them-Eat-Cake.
5. The president should golf A LOT so the public can associate him with a hero like Tiger Woods.
4. The TOTUS's suggested to the FLOTUS that if its cool with the SCOTUS the POTUS should appoint Barney Frank to a newly formed office of HOMOTUS.
3. 90% employment places our economic policy at a 10% rate of success.
2. The president can NEVER be wrong....we need to find 7 more states.
1. Restore the death tax so we can collect a fortune on killing the American Dream.Add a comment
Senator Mitch McConnell gave Al Franken a piece of his mind after being mocked by him in the Senate chambers during his speech in opposition to Elena Kagan's confirmation to the Supreme Court.
I'm glad to hear Franken was apologetic to McConnell after being reminded he is no longer a writer for Saturday Night Live and doesn't have to be unfunny in the Senate too. To be fair, he absolutely did the right thing, but it came only after being taken to task for it.
What if he wasn't? Would he still have been sorry? Did it really have to take a parental scolding for him to actually become self-aware of his teenage antics this time?
Honestly, what does Minnesota have to say for themselves? They gave us a senator who talks and acts like the ventriloquist dummy that he looks like more than than the statesman he should be. He's had a year and a half of practice being an adult now and he still can't get it together when he's presiding over the United States Senate?
YEAH, NO KIDDING!
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for forgiveness, and he did apologize. So this issue is pretty much done, I guess. But now I want to know how many more apologies would it take before Minnesota realizes what many of us in the country already know....
That Al Franken really is sorry.Add a comment
Sacrifice is something that many Americans are becoming all too familiar with during this economic downturn. It was a key theme in President Obama's inaugural address to the nation, and he's referenced it numerous times when lecturing the country on how to get back on its feet.
But while most of the country is pinching pennies and downsizing summer sojourns - or forgoing them altogether - the Obamas don't seem to be heeding their own advice. While many of us are struggling, the First Lady is spending the next few days in a five-star hotel on the chic Costa del Sol in southern Spain with 40 of her "closest friends." According to CNN, the group is expected to occupy 60 to 70 rooms, more than a third of the lodgings at the 160-room resort. Not exactly what one would call cutting back in troubled times.
Reports are calling the lodgings of Obama's Spanish fiesta, the Hotel Villa Padierna in Marbella, "luxurious," "posh" and "a millionaires' playground." Estimated room rate per night? Up to a staggering $2,500. Method of transportation? Air Force Two.
To be clear, what the Obamas do with their money is one thing; what they do with ours is another. Transporting and housing the estimated 70 Secret Service agents who will flank the material girl will cost the taxpayers a pretty penny.
Read the rest of this astute New York Post editorial by Andrea Tartaros here.
I don't know how these people sleep at night, I truly don't, but I do know that Michelle's official portrait needs a redo. I also know what Michelle Antoinette's portrait should look like (click the image to see a larger version)...
As the self-appointed Obesity Czar she's actually worse than a modern day Marie Antoinette because she wouldn't even let us eat cake.Add a comment
is apparently EVAPORATING like it's....
Does ANYONE buy this crap? Oil gushed into the ocean for MONTHS without end to the tune of 5 million barrels. Liberals begged for straight jackets when Exxon Valdez spilled, at its highest estimate, spilled about 750,000 barrels. The ecosystem there STILL hasn't totally recovered.
By the most liberal estimate the gulf oil spill is more than 5 times worse and we're supposed to believe the problem...just went away?
Something tells me the people who put this report together are going to admit they made a mistake sometime after November 2. I don't know...just a hunch.
But don't ask me, I'm a peon whose conservative brain can't comprehend how common sense is defied...
Also, I'm at war with science.Add a comment
It has been said by some that Obama is the smartest president ever, and I'm still waiting for proof because last time I checked arrogance laced playground logic is not much of a factor in the calculating an intelligence quotient.
Did the GOP botch things to the point of deserving to lose power, YES! But the only reason they didn't "go out into the wilderness" because the entire country is there now after Obama dragged it KICKING AND SCREAMING out there with him. There simply wasn't any more room.
This president is on a trajectory to bring more debt to the country than every president before him combined, and he has the nerve to still pop a squat on what the GOP did? Does he think his sinking poll numbers are just dumb luck?
Nobody who hasn't erected a shrine to MSNBC believes Obama is making an honest effort to improve anything. He has made it as clear as the door to the socialist closet he hides behind that he cares more about ideology and less about having the intellectual curiosity to figure out what the right thing to do about anything would be.
This is getting to be so old now, this idiot bashes Bush so much I'm starting to wonder if his marriage to Michelle is a sham.
The recession brought on by the dot com bubble burst came under the Clinton watch. 90% of 9-11 was being planned by Al Queda while Bill Clinton was president. White House interns confused blue dresses with sponges, and you'll find Obama's real birth certificate delivered to Congress via Santa Claus riding a unicorn before you'll ever read a single instance of George W. Bush blaming Bill Clinton for ANYTHING he had to deal with.
So what "new ideas" does the GOP need to come up with anyway? What the hell has been so new about what King Dipp brings to the table?
If the world was a party where everyone was drinking beers and yucking it up to movie quotes from "The Hangover" Obama would be the goofball in the corner sipping Smirnoff Ice from a straw and shouting "AAAAOOOOOOO Buuuuuuudy" because he finally got around to renting "Encino Man" on VHS...and he wants to talk about THAT.
The "remaking" of America he promised in his 2008 victory speech has been nothing more than the jamming of European laws and values down Uncle Sam's throat. And even they are cocking their heads in bemusement at this since neither side has the money to continue the lie that socialism works anymore.
Man I would love to have a chance to debate this guy...mano y teleprompter...I know I'm just a peon, but a six year old could deconstruct his arguments, so I think I can take him.
Why.....why does the GOP need new ideas? "New" ideas are getting us into this mess.
100 years ago 8 grades would cram into one school house and armed with a chalkboard and books (information boxes that don't need to be plugged into a wall) 8th graders were passing exams that today's college student with wifi laptops and wikipedia fail....because educators are always on the look out for...new....ideas...and not focusing on what WAS working.
"New ideas" is just a buzz word ploy to dishonestly characterize systems, such as capitalism, that actually work when they aren't being abused as in need of replacement. Isn't this the kind of "either your with us or against us" stuff that made liberals wet their pants suits when Bush was president?
What the is so damn great about NEW ideas anyway? What about GOOD ideas?.......
What about...."it wasn't broke, so stop fixing it."
Here's a good idea, how about the president and congress try reading the instruction manual that came with this government? Its a little bit longer than the Arizona Immigration Law that they refuse to look at...also, unfortunately for us, its not a new idea...
...but its a damn good one, and they ought to give it a try...Add a comment
There is a small but growing debate about whether or not President Obama's age is approaching or has already passed Biden's IQ. The way things are going I'm wondering if the same argument should start to happen with the big 0 himself.
Ok, its a made up debate, but can anyone give me even one reason why it shouldn't be?
All kidding aside, I hope President Obama's birthday is as happy as the country is with his leadership.
Roll your mouse over 0's birthday card to see the inside and the who's who of signatures...
If for some reason the rollover doesn't work...
Click here to see a larger version of the cover
Click here to see a larger version of the signaturesAdd a comment
Something had to get Tipper's panties in a bunch, and we know it wasn't Al. So the question is...why pick on Twisted Sister?
If you forget the fact that these guys look like they just did the walk of shame from Barney Frank's house their song sounds something like an anthem for the Tea Party...
Of course the Dems wanted to stop them...Add a comment