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Satire Headlines Archive Update December 14-21

The following are now posted in the Satire Headlines Archive

SEN. SCHUMER SAYS HE NEVER MEANT TO CALL FLIGHT ATTENDANT "BITCH", CLAIMS WITHOUT GLASSES SHE LOOKED LIKE A MIRROR - December 21

AS BLIZZARD HITS WASHINGTON DC THE PRESIDENT IS NOT AMUSED BY NEW NICKNAME AT CLIMATE SUMMIT, "SNOWBAMA" - December 18

OBAMA ORDERS TAILOR FOR WHITE HOUSE DOG TO MAKE SPECIAL CLIMATE SUMMIT SWEATER FOR SHIVERING TELEPROMPTER - December 18

OBAMA ADMITS MISTAKE IN GIVING ADMINISTRATION "SOLID B+," THOUGHT HE WAS GIVING BARNEY FRANKS SCORE ON GAYDATE.COM - December 17

OBAMA ADMITS MISTAKE IN GIVING ADMINISTRATION "SOLID B+," THOUGHT HE WAS RATING HIS BIRTH CERTIFICATE GUY - December 17

OBAMA ADMITS MISTAKE IN GIVING ADMINISTRATION "SOLID B+," THOUGHT HE WAS GUESSING HELEN THOMAS'S CUP SIZE - December 17

OBAMA ADMITS MISTAKE IN GIVING ADMINISTRATION "SOLID B+," THOUGHT HE WAS GUESSING U.S. CREDIT RATING - December 17

OBAMA ADMITS MISTAKE IN GIVING ADMINISTRATION "SOLID B+," THOUGHT HE WAS GRADING CHINA'S HUMAN RIGHTS RECORD - December 17

WORLD'S DICTATORS DEMAND OBAMA'S LETTER TO KIM JONG IL BE POSTED ON FACEBOOK SO THEY CAN "LIKE" IT - December 16

DEMS NOW CLAIM HEALTH BILL IS BUDGET NEUTRAL AS IT WILL COST NOTHING SINCE THE DOLLAR WILL BE WORTH NOTHING - December 16

OBAMA OPINES RETROFITTED ENERGY EFFICIENT HOMES NOT AS SEXY AS CLIMATE SUMMIT SPONSORED PRIVATE JETS SHOWS - December 15

OBAMA SAYS MAKING HOMES ENERGY EFFICIENT IS SEXY IN A ROSIE O'DONNELL WEARING LINGERIE SORT OF WAY - December 15

OBAMA SPLIT ON IF HE SHOULD RECOGNIZE KWANZAA, ASKS CABINET FOR VOTE TO HELP BREAK TIE WITH HIMSELF - December 14

DEMS CONFUSED ABOUT WHETHER SENATOR REID IS STRUGGLING TO FIND FOR 60 VOTES FOR HEALTH BILL OR REELECTION - December 14