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Satire Headline Archive Update January 26 - February 10

Here are the latest additions to the 2010 Satire Headline Archive...



IRAN CONFESSES PURSUIT OF NUKES IS REALLY JUST AN EFFORT TO BEAT OUT SARAH PALIN FOR MEDIA ATTENTION" - February 10

NEW POLL FINDS DEMS IS EXPECTED TO PARTICIPATE IN WAR ON CHILDHOOD OBESITY FOR "OBVIOUS REASONS" - February 10

OBAMA SAYS HE WASN'T AWARE OF PALIN USING NOTES ON HAND UNTIL BEING FULLY BRIEFED BY HIS TELEPROMPTER - February 9

MSNBC TELEPROMPTERS BREAK DOWN, CUE CARD BOY OUT SICK, OLBERMAN FORGETS TO BLAST PALIN FOR HAND NOTES - February 9

DEMS REMAIN CRYPTIC ON REASON FEDERAL DEBT LIMIT NEEDS TO BE DOUBLED THE DAY AFTER SUPER BOWL - February 8

CANADA THANKS COLTS AS WAGER WITH OBAMA OVER SUPER BOWL WILL BRING HEALTH CARE SYSTEMS TRADE WITH U.S. - February 8

AFTER PICK OF COLTS TO WIN SUPER BOWL, OBAMA LAMENTS THAT IF FECES WERE LIKE GOLD HE'D BE KING MIDAS - February 8

OBAMA NOT ABLE TO FINISH STATEMENT WISHING HE COULD "HAND JOBS OUT" WHEN BARNEY FRANK SHOUTS "ME FIRST!" - February 5

NEW POLL SHOWS HALF OF THOSE WHO DISAPPROVE OF TEA PARTIES ARE DEMOCRATS, THE OTHER HALF IS OBAMA'S EGO - February 5

LAS VEGAS UNVEILS NEW SLOGAN: WHAT HAPPENS HERE CREATES LESS DEBT THAN OBAMA'S BUDGET

OBAMA ADMINISTRATION TO GO AFTER TOYOTA FOR BAD CARS BECAUSE ONLY VOTERS ARE ALLOWED TO MAKE MISTAKES - February 4

LAS VEGAS UNVEILS NEW SLOGAN: WHAT HAPPENS HERE IS MONEY WELL SPENT COMPARED TO OBAMA'S BUDGET - February 3

LAS VEGAS UNVEILS NEW SLOGAN: WHAT HAPPENS HERE IS MONEY WELL SPENT COMPARED TO OBAMA'S BUDGET - February 3

AFTER "NO SPENDING IN VEGAS" COMMENT, OBAMA PLEDGES NOT TO "BLOW MONEY ON BONUS PAY FOR TELEPROMPTERS" - February 3

CLIMATEGATE SCIENTISTS ADMIT SKEWED WARMING DATA MAY BE DUE TO MELTING ICE MAKING THEM SEXUALLY AROUSED - February 3

RAHM EMANUEL EXPLAINS SAYING "RETARDED" NOT MEANT TO DEGRADE, HE IS ACTUALLY STATING WHAT HE ASPIRES TO BE - February 1

DNC CONSIDERS HOLDING 2012 CONVENTION IN FOREIGN NATION, AWAITS PERMISSION FROM CITY OF SAN FRANCISCO - February 1

$3.8 TRILLION DEFICIT HIKING BUDGET HAS GOP CONCERNED OBAMA HAS ONE OF TOYOTA'S STICKY GAS PEDALS - February 1

AS HUGO CHAVEZ APPLAUDS OBAMA PROPOSAL TO END PARTISAN RANCOR IN DC GOP REFUSES VOTE TO DISBAND ITSELF - January 29

HAZMAT TEAM CLEARS BOTOX SPILL FROM ACCUPUNTURE FACILITY AFTER PROCEDURE IS APPLIED TO PELOSI'S FACE - January 29

OBAMA EXPERIENCES SEVERE NECK PAIN AFTER REBUKE OF SUPREME COURT, CAN NO LONGER SUPPORT WEIGHT OF HEAD - January 28

CRITICS HAIL OBAMA'S FIRST STATE OF THE UNION AS THE FEEL GOOD COMEDY EVENT OF THE 2010 CAMPAIGN SEASON - January 28

OBAMA'S TELEPROMPTER BREAKS DOWN AT STATE OF THE UNION PREP, KEEPS FLASHING "I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE" - January 27

WANTING A STATE OF THE UNION ABOUT BETTER TIMES OBAMA WARNS SPEECHWRITERS TO NOT PLAGIARIZE GEORGE W BUSH - January 27

BARNEY FRANK INFORMS BIDEN THE MASSACHUSETTS MANDATE WITH SCOTT BROWN WAS ABOUT VOTING, NOT ROMANCE - January 26

OBAMA SIGNS EXECUTIVE ORDER MAKING APPROVAL RATINGS WORK LIKE GOLF SCORES, TOUTS RISING POPULARITY - January 26